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The Story: Aliens, having failed eight times in taming the warlike people of Earth, resort to turning the recently deceased into zombies to eliminate humanity's threat to the rest of the Universe. A few heroic people stand in their way.

Is this one of the greatest films ever made? To be sure, there are nearly as many opinions about this as there are films, but any reasonably objective list of cinema's masterpieces must include this science fiction/horror epic (with its heartfelt and poignant anti-war message) somewhere near the top. This is the towering achievement in the fruitful career of Ed Wood, the brilliant but relatively unsung and under appreciated B movie king of cinema's science fiction/horror golden era. So singular was his vision that Tim Burton saw fit to make a reverent film of his life in one of the greatest movies of the 1990's, the aptly titled "Ed Wood."

Enough about the man in cashmere, as it is his film we come to praise: We begin with the ominous Criswell speaking directly to the camera with a simply stated but powerfully portentious speech: "Greetings, my friends. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember, my friends, future events such as these will affect you in the future."

We then meet an elderly man (Bela Lugosi), who is a shadow of his former self, having recently lost his wife. But this is just the beginning of the horrors to come, as we find that alien invaders have tried eight different plans to tame the warlike people of Earth. It seems that humans, who have discovered the terrible power of atomic energy, may soon discover the unspeakably destructive potential to be harnessed by splitting the very particles of sunlight itself! So unthinkable is this possibility that the aliens have only one hope to save the universe: Bring the dead back to life and turn them against the living! They only manage to come up with three zombies, two of which are the old man and his wife, but when you see them you'll know they are enough. Keep in mind that this groundbreaking film came a decade before "Night of the Living Dead." As the man says, "There comes a time in every man's life when he cannot believe what his eyes see." It is now up to a few good, unwar like people of Earth (Led by Gregory Walcott and Mona McKinnon) to save mankind. Will they succeed? Certainly I will not be the one to ruin this for you. You will simply have to see the film to find out for yourself.

This film has something for everyone: Romance, thrills, futuristic spacecraft, hair-raising suspense and yes, even a few laughs. In fact, there are moments when you will laugh until you nearly cry and wonder why a talent such as Wood's is not to be found these days. This is modern cinema's loss but there are still a few films such as this one left to remind us of what used to be.

Is this a perfect film? Of course it isn't, but sometimes with low-budget films we should overlook a few shortcomings. Sure, there are a few moments when the obviously cardboard sets topple as people bump into them. Certainly, the flying saucers look like wobbling paper plates on visible strings. And yes, the unfortunate Bela Lugosi DID die before Wood started filming his masterpiece but a chiropractor friend of his who was no more than a foot taller than Lugosi was able to fill in quite nicely. All he had to do was hold a cape over his face for the whole movie. We can forgive that and may not even notice if it isn't pointed out to us. At least we have that narrated footage of The Great One spliced in to make the illusion more real. And yes, because of budgetary constraints, the cockpit of a plane was made up of a couple of cheap props and a shower curtain behind the pilots and the spaceship interior is similarly constructed. We could nit-pick about such meaningless trifles for days. In fact, I have read whole articles overflowing with such finicky complaints, written by people who even seemed to think that this was not a good film. Such critics are not to be scolded or scoffed at, but to be pitied for their narrow-mindedness.

In the end, if it is a good film, who cares if the alien ruler (John "Bunny" Breckenridge) is obviously reading directly from his script which he makes no effort to conceal? This film was made on a short timetable, and as the poor man appears to have done this film while under the influence of alcohol, who could expect him to memorize Wood's rich and complicated dialogue? Who cares if scenes change from night to day and day to night in mere seconds, and who cares if a detective absentmindedly scratches his forehead with the barrel of his revolver as he mutters the immortal line, "Inspector Clay is dead! Murdered! And someone's responsible!" Certainly not I, and in fact I praise Wood and his cast and crew for having the artistic integrity to carry on in the face of such trivial matters.

I leave you with some unforgettable lines of dialogue from this timeless wonder of classic horror filmmaking, as they more than speak for themselves:

Alien Ruler: "Plan 9? Ah, yes. (Picks up script and begins to read) Plan 9 deals with the resurrection of the dead. Long distance electrodes shot into the pineal and pituitary gland of the recently dead."

Paula Trent (Mona McKinnon): "I've never seen you in this mood before." Jeff Trent (Gregory Walcott): "I guess that's because I've never been in this mood before."

Gravedigger: "I don't like hearing noises, especially when there ain't supposed to be any."

Criswell: "The ever-beautiful flowers she had planted with her own hands became nothing more than the lost roses of her cheeks."

Air Force Captain: "Visits? That would indicate visitors!"

And last, but not least: "For a time we tried to contact them by radio but no response. Then they attacked a town, a small town I'll admit, but nevertheless a town of people, people who died."

Can you prove it didn't happen? Plan 9 From Outer Space: It's not just a film, it's a movie. Don't miss it